Monday, August 31, 2009

A New Twist on an Old Friendship

Today was an maybe one of the most interesting days that I can remember in recent history. Although I cannot give you the full blown details, suffice it to say I am smiling and very curious about what tomorrow might hold for us. I am forever the optimistic. The glass is always half full for me, no matter what the circumstances.

The DH is considering something I think needs to be done. I am curious to know what he will decide. He always thinks these things through from start to finish, putting it all into perspective in every possible scenario. Something I have never been able to do. I admire this and yet I know with my personality it just wouldn't work for me, so I allow him to do it. LOL

I moved to a larger desk at work today. There is a new hire coming on aboard the week after Labor Day. She can have the small desk. My new desk is much larger, so I don't feel as if I am cramped and limited in my space. I am also in a corner; which is a nice touch.

I found and orderded Cincinnati Bengals and UC Bearcats fabric today to sew in as liners to bags for the craft fairs. The Martini bag is almost crocheted together. I should be able to cut the fabric tomorrow.

SONG OF THE BLOG: "Night Moves" by Bob Seger

Sunday, August 30, 2009

Sunday, Bloody Sunday

Here it is Sunday night and I'm nowhere near ready for the weekend to come to an end. It flew by, like they all do anymore. I know part of the problem is my naps. I get so tired during the day that I just crash for a couple of hours. It's a habit I wish I could break. Sort of like requiring 7-8 hours of sleep at night in order to function. I can't change that no matter how much I wish I could. So I need to cherish the weekend hours I am actually awake... Seems like a daunting task.

This evening I picked the daughter up from the airport. She went over for the weekend to see her new nephew. I knew it could be emotionally draining for her and it was. She went to see the gparents while she was there and of course, the discussion turned to the family. It's never an easy thing to have to live with - family disfunction in it's most evil and raw form. I am not happy to be in this one right now. If I could somehow opt out I think I would do so, but we all know that's not possible so here I am. For better or worse as they say. All I know is that it occupies way too much of my time and energy and I don't know how much of either I have left. Sadly we did get confirmation that the DH's brother is a liar and has gone back to Phoenix with a bucket full of BS. Nice to know all of the DH's efforts to help his bro got shoved right back down his throat. It's sickening in a way at how easily blood can turn on their own. We know now he can never be trusted and the DH says that bridge has been burned. The only good thing that came out of it all is that now his mother knows he is capable and does lie.

It was hot again today. The DH and I went to breakfast and afterwards went back to the old barn and got the rest of our belongings; black mats that weigh a ton, white water buckets and the black feed tubs. We got them home and although against all regs we hosed the black mats down anyway - and right on the driveway. They still sit there as I type. We hope they lose some of the horsey smell because our plans are to lie them inside the garage for safe keeping until we move to our own place. They are $50 a piece and we have four. No way are we giving them away.

I worked on a bag today that I am going to call "Martini". It's black with a pink and olive stripe pattern. For some reason it just reminds me of a Martini... Not sure yet about the liner. I have several fabrics to choose from in my stash. I hope to start that on Tuesday. Right now I have 3 bags total for the Oct craft fair in Ohio. There is a solo bag at the salon that I might pull back to ship. Haven't decided just yet. My cousin suggested using Bengals, UC Bearcats and Xavier colors because they are big sellers. I need to explore that option for scarves I do believe.

Thursday night is the final "Thirsty Thursday" at the ballpark. Brings an end to the summer season. Can't believe Labor Day is just around the corner. Not sure yet about how my work week will be effected. The Marines are off on a 96. Not really much to do when the Marines aren't around, so we'll see what happens.

Football season is right around the corner. I'm happy about this because I really do enjoy watching it now that I know more about it. Go Colts!

Lastly - WHERE THE HECK IS EVERYONE???????????????????????? WHY AREN'T YOU BLOGGING AND/OR COMMENTING??????????????????????????

SONG OF THE BLOG: "Dead Flowers" by Miranda Lambert. Sad song but man is it well written...

Saturday, August 29, 2009

Life 1; Red 0

I have been thinking way too much today. Actually, it started yesterday. Driving home from work I began to analyze and then over analyze myself into a mild panic attack. It's a vice of mine - over analyzing EVERYTHING. I know I can drive myself into a frenzy and yet I still do it. Through the years I have worked on trying to have more patience with others. I think I have managed that pretty well, so perhaps now at this stage in my life I need to stop allowing myself to over think every aspect of my life.

I'm curious to know how many of you ask for "life" to give you a sign when trying to make a decision. I am one of these people. I will literally talk to God for hours on end asking him to please leave me a sign (you know, a big huge note written on the bathroom mirror that only I can see, or maybe a special text message telling me what I should do). Never happens. I think I get a sign and I have simply misread my emotions and instead of being the right way I end up worse off than I was. I don't know.. I keep thinking I am almost 46 years old and that's closer to the end than it is to the beginning so I'm getting a tad bit worried I don't have the time left to find the right answers.

Someone told me the other day that as long as I was walking, talking and had people in my life that I love and that love me in return I am doing alright. They told me that is happiness and that I was asking for way too much. I'm processing this and it's not sitting too well with my 1) heart and 2) the Libra-needs-balance part of me. At what point does a person become fulfilled in life? Isn't that a personal journey? What is happiness to some isn't necessarily happiness to others.

I am happy creating things with my yarn. I find much satisfaction in the process of putting something together, seeing the end product and then especially when someone has it for their own. But I don't have nearly enough time to crochet as I would like. Just when I sit down and start in, it seems I have something I have to do and so I must leave my passion for less thrilling chores. Afterwards I'm often too tired to pick it up again or perhaps I have lost the moment.

Today I rode Dolly around the new barn property. I lounged her first in the arena thinking she would be quite excited and full of herself, but she surprised me and was not. She seemed rather calm and curious, so I threw a leg over her and we rode for a bit. She was amazingly easy going and the only thing that had her acting a bit cautious was a roll of wire fencing lying beneath a row of grapes. I tried coaxing her to them while still in the saddle but that wasn't working, so I hopped off and led her right to the wire. She seemed less interested when she was closer to it and decided to sample the grape leaves instead. The vines are about ready for harvest. They hang heavy with bunches of deep purple grapes. I thought about tasting one..but hesitated. Maybe tomorrow.

I have two craft fairs to prep for. One is Oct 3 & 4th. I do not know how much inventory I have already for that one, but I need to pull out my containers and find out. The second one is Dec 5 & 6th. If I work hard and steady I could have a fair amount of bags done for that one. By "fair" I mean maybe ten. And that's not a lot really when you think about a two day craft fair, but really what are my options? Hire out workers? LOL

I had stopped listening to Daughtry's new CD (and his old CD for that matter) because... Well, just because. Now I find myself singing the songs on my own and that's a tad disturbing, or enlightening depending on how you look at it. Part of me feels like that chapter has passed and the new one has started, but I still feel a tremendous pull towards that time. So for now I am going to let it pull me, or push me? Why does it have to be a step backward? Why can't it be a push forward?

SONG OF THE BLOG: "Tennesse Line" by Daughtry

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Time sure flies

I had no idea it had been so long since my last blog post. I'd say I was sorry but I'm not sure anyone is still reading. LOL So where to begin...?

Well, first off I have a new Storm BB and let me just say it was the best purchase of my phone life to date. I do miss my submarine GZone, but only because it was so dang cool looking. This BB has everything. If I could just get it to do the chores I don't like doing I would be in heaven. I can update Facebook and Twitter, as well as read my emails and text messages. It's amazing. <3 my Storm.

Next on the list is the big Daughtry concert on August 22nd. OK, I can't believe it's in less than two weeks. I have been shopping for new clothes for the trip. Found a really cute dress for the concert. It's at the very nice Pure club, so there is a dress code. We have two nights confirmed at the hotel and I plan on relaxing and making the most of it.

The Harley is still way up on my list of the best things ever. Riding it has brought me more friends and cooler relationships than I ever dreamed of. I rode with the O Chapter of the Vietnam Vets/Legacy Vets club on July 26th. They allowed me to literally ride in their pack, which is an honor in itself. They are such a neat group of men, each with a story.

Work is going great. I love it, which I know is not something many people can say. But I can and I say it often!